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Eyes closed. Avoid light. Feel your way to the bathroom. Make sure toilet lid is up (or sit, I’m not judging). Make sure you’re not accidentally in the closet.
Heh. I can’t tell if this is a deliberate misinterpretation (in which case, pretty funny) or not (seems unlikely).
I broke my ankle taking out some recycling. It was sleeting heavily at the time and I was wearing my wife’s flip-flops because I couldn’t find my shoes (edit: fun fact, it turned out I had set the recycling on my shoes while looking for them). I slipped and fell off the front porch and my ankle broke when I landed.
I’ve dislocated my shoulder fourteen times, so I thought the ankle was just dislocated. Based on my experience with my shoulder, I tried to reset the ankle and stand back up … Twice. I only stopped because my neighbor heard me and came over to investigate; in a twist I wouldn’t believe in a movie, he turned out to be a physical therapist who mostly worked with ankles. He was a tremendous comfort because he was able to answer most of my questions while we waited for the ambulance.
The EMTs made me hop down the stairs of my front porch on one foot before they put me on the stretcher. To this day I wonder what they would have done if I’d broken both ankles or been several floors up or something.
I have so many stories about that night. It has shaped my life in one way or another ever since.
That’s pretty much what all the medical staff said!
At one point I had to stop and just kind of breathe in the middle of a sentence, then said “sorry … It hurts.” The nurse looked down pointedly and said “well, yeah. Have you seen your foot?”
Disagree. The more parallel your stream is to the surface it’s hitting, the less likelihood of a splash. It’s hard to get a good angle in a toilet unless you really try. It’s very easy to do that in a sink at or slightly below dick level.
If I did this I’d end up blindly stepping on a giant house spider or one of the many bugs they’re supposed to be eating. I have too many critters sneaking into my bathroom
Eyes closed. Avoid light. Feel your way to the bathroom. Make sure toilet lid is up (or sit, I’m not judging). Make sure you’re not accidentally in the closet.
Always sit, are you kidding? No way I’m peeing standing up with the lights off.
I broke my ankle a while back and it never healed properly. Since then I’ve appreciated the relief of sitting to pee.
You must be clumsy as fuck if you managed to break you ankle while you were standing to pee. Either that or your technique is waaaaaaaayyy off.
Heh. I can’t tell if this is a deliberate misinterpretation (in which case, pretty funny) or not (seems unlikely).
I broke my ankle taking out some recycling. It was sleeting heavily at the time and I was wearing my wife’s flip-flops because I couldn’t find my shoes (edit: fun fact, it turned out I had set the recycling on my shoes while looking for them). I slipped and fell off the front porch and my ankle broke when I landed.
I’ve dislocated my shoulder fourteen times, so I thought the ankle was just dislocated. Based on my experience with my shoulder, I tried to reset the ankle and stand back up … Twice. I only stopped because my neighbor heard me and came over to investigate; in a twist I wouldn’t believe in a movie, he turned out to be a physical therapist who mostly worked with ankles. He was a tremendous comfort because he was able to answer most of my questions while we waited for the ambulance.
The EMTs made me hop down the stairs of my front porch on one foot before they put me on the stretcher. To this day I wonder what they would have done if I’d broken both ankles or been several floors up or something.
I have so many stories about that night. It has shaped my life in one way or another ever since.
Oooooouuuuuuch
That’s pretty much what all the medical staff said!
At one point I had to stop and just kind of breathe in the middle of a sentence, then said “sorry … It hurts.” The nurse looked down pointedly and said “well, yeah. Have you seen your foot?”
Also, even if you don’t see it, it splashes everywhere.
That’s why you just pee in the sink
This does not seem like an effective way to reduce splashing.
Disagree. The more parallel your stream is to the surface it’s hitting, the less likelihood of a splash. It’s hard to get a good angle in a toilet unless you really try. It’s very easy to do that in a sink at or slightly below dick level.
This is written by someone who a. Is tall enough to piss straight in the sink and b. Is not a grower.
I pee in the shower, harder to miss when drunk.
Instructions unclear, am now secretly gay
Just from sitting down to pee once? I knew it
Well, now your out of the closet.
If I did this I’d end up blindly stepping on a giant house spider or one of the many bugs they’re supposed to be eating. I have too many critters sneaking into my bathroom
When my mom was pregnant with my eldest sister in Greece, she apparently once headed to the bathroom, only to find a scorpion waiting on the doorknob.
Stepping on a spider seems preferable.