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Calling people out for being condescending is not the same as being condescending. This reeks of the same mentality that people who unironically say hating racists makes you hateful and therefore just as bad as racists have.
You’re awfully judgy for someone who doesn’t like other people judging you for having kids.
Just let people have a difference of opinion to you. It’s okay if some people look down on your choices. This is inevitable in life.