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Me as an instance admin sitting here reading about how Lemmy doesn’t have trolls and Russian bots, while I’m in a chat with other instance admins and mods where we need to actively coordinate to fight the trolls and Russian bots 😐
Welcome to IT. If everything is on fire, they ask why you’re even here, and if everything is ready for the fire and there’s nothing left to do, they also ask why you’re even here
After hexbear got defederated from most of the major instances, the fucking losers just make alts on different instances so they can continue defending that propaganda filled shithole. Now .ml seems like the new worst, no matter what you do these no-life losers will find a way to spread their bullshit.
Takes much more effort to try and stop them than it does for these losers to make alts unfortunately.
Ml is run by the creators of Lemmy, and hexbear is well… Not. Hexbear made their own fork of lemmy a long time ago and only in the past year or so have they been actually able to federate at all. I don’t see the creators of Lemmy going through all that effort to hide their identities if they were actually running hexbear behind the scenes
Hexbear wasn’t federated to begin with for many instances, and Lemmy.ml hasn’t really changed as a result of Hexbear getting defederated by servers like Lemmy.world and Lemmy.ca, because Hexbear has a more secluded user-base. Hexbear intentionally tries to be careful with who they federate with.
Somewhere in Moscow, there’s a big red phone that connects to its counterpart in Beijing, where Vladimir Putin and Xi Jinping discuss the latest attempts to influence an indie reddit spin-off with an elaborate network of Markov Chain LLMs producing comments like “I wish y’all wouldn’t be so nakedly racist towards people from other countries.”
That’s honestly pretty amazing that you’ve been here a year and haven’t seen a troll! Though you’re on an instance with a very active and determined admin, there is definitely a difference in how much you see between instances because of how removals work.
You guys are pretty proactive about blocking and defederating bad faith instances, or even ones not doing enough to deal with bad actors. You were one of the first to defederate Hexbear, and I think you even defederated world at one point?
Chasers are dangerous to the trans community and turn people into fetish objects, rather than recognizing them as people. It ignores the desires of trans individuals who wish to be seen as the gender they identify with and explicitly chases trans individuals for their being trans.
Ie, a transwoman is pursued for being a transwoman and not for being a woman.
Hey that was me back when I had a kbin account. I’m the account in the screenshot.
That was a direct response to someone asking if I would have sex with a trans man. I got accused of being a chaser for saying “sure, I guess, pre-transition” (the first part) and being a transphobe for saying “but I’m not sexually attracted to dicks” (the second part). Note those two accusations are more or less mutually exclusive, but it doesn’t matter because they’re both deeply, incredibly stupid accusations. The mods and admins of blahaj pointed out how incredibly stupid the accusations were, and some people didn’t like being called stupid, so they went back to hexbear. And continued to be stupid.
To use an analogy, imagine you’re fat and trying to lose weight. Someone admits they are attracted to you, “sure, as long as you’re still fat”. Can you see how this would not be a good basis for a healthy relationship? You could even say it is a sign of a “chubby chaser”. Likewise for transness.
Also, people are overly sensitive because being denied full/legitimate relationships is a frequent pain point for trans people (esp trans women). The classic trope is the boyfriend who will take you on dates but refuse to introduce you to his friends/relatives.
So yeah, I can see why a queer friendly instance would defederate an instance whose admins promote/defend that sort of rhetoric. Hexbear might have jumped the gun (as I told them at the time- the turnaround time was less than 24 hours and the head admin had no chance to respond) but the blahaj admins weren’t great either
Some people like being fat. Some people like being women.
A person who likes bobs and vagene entering a committed relationship with a trans man would be toxic. Ditto for a person who likes fat people entering a committed relationship with someone who is trying to lose weight. That said, firstly, I don’t see anything wrong with a one-night stand in either of those scenarios, which is what the original question was, and secondly, more importantly, you’d have to stretch really hard to say that a person who’s into a little chub and a person who’s perfectly happy having a little chub entering a committed relationship is in any way problematic. OP is into women. If anyone unironically tries to call someone a pussy-chaser I’m going to recommend them for commitment.
OP saying he’d have sex with a trans man who hadn’t transitioned yet is no different than a lover of booty saying they’d have sex with someone who hadn’t lost weight yet. Sure, it might be a little confusing and/or disheartening for his potential sexual partner to be told that he likes them for the one aspect of themselves that they’re working to change, but if it’s only for one night, and that person otherwise has a good support network, and, most importantly, it’s two consenting adults, I don’t see the harm.
You could even say it is a sign of a “chubby chaser”. Likewise for transness.
Yeah, if you’re deeply stupid. Or, as you suggested, so traumatized by life that you have no understanding of normal human interrepationships. Just because you are open to the idea of having sex with a fat person, that does not make you a chubby chaser. That’s not at all what that means.
In your analogy, the proper response for the fat person would be “that makes me feel bad” and NOT “you are a bad person”. Take some ownership for your feelings. People are allowed to have sexual preferences. That is 100% normal. If it’s triggering for you, then it’s on you to manage your response, not lash out.
Also, people are overly sensitive
Understatement of the year. I think we need to acknowledge that some trans communities can get extremely toxic. Woe unto you if you get caught in their crosshairs for whatever reason. Sure, this may stem from trauma or transphobia/discrimination, but we shouldn’t pretend it’s not a thing.
My pet theory is that trans people are excluded from so many groups that groups of trans people by necessity get very insular. And insular groups tend towards shittiness, almost universally.
Me as an instance admin sitting here reading about how Lemmy doesn’t have trolls and Russian bots, while I’m in a chat with other instance admins and mods where we need to actively coordinate to fight the trolls and Russian bots 😐
Welcome to IT. If everything is on fire, they ask why you’re even here, and if everything is ready for the fire and there’s nothing left to do, they also ask why you’re even here
Thank you for your service! (sounds sarcastic, is not)
Yeah… OP is blind to the massive Kremlin and CCP propaganda problem here in the Fediverse.
After hexbear got defederated from most of the major instances, the fucking losers just make alts on different instances so they can continue defending that propaganda filled shithole. Now .ml seems like the new worst, no matter what you do these no-life losers will find a way to spread their bullshit.
Takes much more effort to try and stop them than it does for these losers to make alts unfortunately.
I was under the impression that the .ml admins actually promote them because it’s run by people from Hexbear.
Confusing the bear with 'grad
It’s a bit more mask on, and there’s a few legit communities there, as opposed to Hexbear where the entire instance has a stated goal.
But it’s pretty bad.
Ml is run by the creators of Lemmy, and hexbear is well… Not. Hexbear made their own fork of lemmy a long time ago and only in the past year or so have they been actually able to federate at all. I don’t see the creators of Lemmy going through all that effort to hide their identities if they were actually running hexbear behind the scenes
Hexbear wasn’t federated to begin with for many instances, and Lemmy.ml hasn’t really changed as a result of Hexbear getting defederated by servers like Lemmy.world and Lemmy.ca, because Hexbear has a more secluded user-base. Hexbear intentionally tries to be careful with who they federate with.
They’re not just some losers sitting on their mom’s basements, they’re paid or programmed to spread disinformation and division.
By a continuous shifting of rhetorical focus, the enemies are at the same time too strong and too weak.
deleted by creator
Somewhere in Moscow, there’s a big red phone that connects to its counterpart in Beijing, where Vladimir Putin and Xi Jinping discuss the latest attempts to influence an indie reddit spin-off with an elaborate network of Markov Chain LLMs producing comments like “I wish y’all wouldn’t be so nakedly racist towards people from other countries.”
I’m yet to see any in the last year personally, so I guess it’s working?
That’s honestly pretty amazing that you’ve been here a year and haven’t seen a troll! Though you’re on an instance with a very active and determined admin, there is definitely a difference in how much you see between instances because of how removals work.
picking the right instance seems to be half the battle for users
You guys are pretty proactive about blocking and defederating bad faith instances, or even ones not doing enough to deal with bad actors. You were one of the first to defederate Hexbear, and I think you even defederated world at one point?
Hexbear defederated blahaj.zone, actually. Here is the original thread going over why.
The fuck is a chaser?
Here’s a good reddit thread over on r/asktransgender.
Chasers are dangerous to the trans community and turn people into fetish objects, rather than recognizing them as people. It ignores the desires of trans individuals who wish to be seen as the gender they identify with and explicitly chases trans individuals for their being trans.
Ie, a transwoman is pursued for being a transwoman and not for being a woman.
Hey that was me back when I had a kbin account. I’m the account in the screenshot.
That was a direct response to someone asking if I would have sex with a trans man. I got accused of being a chaser for saying “sure, I guess, pre-transition” (the first part) and being a transphobe for saying “but I’m not sexually attracted to dicks” (the second part). Note those two accusations are more or less mutually exclusive, but it doesn’t matter because they’re both deeply, incredibly stupid accusations. The mods and admins of blahaj pointed out how incredibly stupid the accusations were, and some people didn’t like being called stupid, so they went back to hexbear. And continued to be stupid.
To use an analogy, imagine you’re fat and trying to lose weight. Someone admits they are attracted to you, “sure, as long as you’re still fat”. Can you see how this would not be a good basis for a healthy relationship? You could even say it is a sign of a “chubby chaser”. Likewise for transness.
Also, people are overly sensitive because being denied full/legitimate relationships is a frequent pain point for trans people (esp trans women). The classic trope is the boyfriend who will take you on dates but refuse to introduce you to his friends/relatives.
So yeah, I can see why a queer friendly instance would defederate an instance whose admins promote/defend that sort of rhetoric. Hexbear might have jumped the gun (as I told them at the time- the turnaround time was less than 24 hours and the head admin had no chance to respond) but the blahaj admins weren’t great either
Some people like being fat. Some people like being women.
A person who likes bobs and vagene entering a committed relationship with a trans man would be toxic. Ditto for a person who likes fat people entering a committed relationship with someone who is trying to lose weight. That said, firstly, I don’t see anything wrong with a one-night stand in either of those scenarios, which is what the original question was, and secondly, more importantly, you’d have to stretch really hard to say that a person who’s into a little chub and a person who’s perfectly happy having a little chub entering a committed relationship is in any way problematic. OP is into women. If anyone unironically tries to call someone a pussy-chaser I’m going to recommend them for commitment.
OP saying he’d have sex with a trans man who hadn’t transitioned yet is no different than a lover of booty saying they’d have sex with someone who hadn’t lost weight yet. Sure, it might be a little confusing and/or disheartening for his potential sexual partner to be told that he likes them for the one aspect of themselves that they’re working to change, but if it’s only for one night, and that person otherwise has a good support network, and, most importantly, it’s two consenting adults, I don’t see the harm.
Yeah, if you’re deeply stupid. Or, as you suggested, so traumatized by life that you have no understanding of normal human interrepationships. Just because you are open to the idea of having sex with a fat person, that does not make you a chubby chaser. That’s not at all what that means.
In your analogy, the proper response for the fat person would be “that makes me feel bad” and NOT “you are a bad person”. Take some ownership for your feelings. People are allowed to have sexual preferences. That is 100% normal. If it’s triggering for you, then it’s on you to manage your response, not lash out.
Understatement of the year. I think we need to acknowledge that some trans communities can get extremely toxic. Woe unto you if you get caught in their crosshairs for whatever reason. Sure, this may stem from trauma or transphobia/discrimination, but we shouldn’t pretend it’s not a thing.
My pet theory is that trans people are excluded from so many groups that groups of trans people by necessity get very insular. And insular groups tend towards shittiness, almost universally.
To be clear, being a chaser is transphobic.
How is it not transphile?
Sure, depending on how you define chaser, but it’s not applicable here.
It sounds like the polar opposite to me.
A chaser is someone who fetishizes and objectifies trans people.
Thank you for your service
I haven’t seen much of it at all in my 1+ year here, so y’all are doing a great job :3
Oh, hey Dave. Small world huh?
👋
The matrix admin group or a different one?
The matrix one