Our Shrek who is in heaven, bless us with your swampy holiness and deliver us from the temptations of Lord Farqhuar. We worship you and your sacred donkey prophet, amen.

Act like I ain’t picking Shrek, come on!

Git out muh swamp.

Whoa. Is that Shrek from Shrek 2?

I just saw this starting screen before I was born.

I didn’t choose the onion god, the onion god chose me

No lie, I’d buy that for my wife as long as it was CZ or some other not-diamond gemstone.